Love Rotting Away

After we remarried, I had an affair. Caelum Pemberton tore the room apart in a fit of rage. His face darkened as he demanded, "Are you doing this to get back at me?" This time, I was the calm one. "I was just curious to see how thrilling an affair could be. After all, you kept doing it over and over again." His eyes reddened. He gritted his teeth and forced a bitter smile. "Are you satisfied now? Do you hate me that much?" I simply smiled. I was already dying. I had no strength left to waste on hating him. Chapter 1 I sat on the edge of the bed, my clothes hastily thrown on. "Your body and mind can be separate. Why can't mine?" The room was a wreck, and the charged intimacy of what had just happened still lingered in the air. Caelum stood in the darkness, blood dripping from his fingers. Milo Chavez knelt at his feet, trembling. "Get out," Caelum ordered through gritted teeth. Milo scrambled away on his hands and knees, leaving us alone. Caelum's expression went blank. He strode toward me, seized my arm, and dragged me into the bathroom. "Don't touch me! Mmph!" He threw me into the bathtub. My clothes were already half undone, and he tore off the rest. He snatched up the showerhead and blasted me with ice-cold water. He pinned me down despite my struggles. "Annie. Just this once." His voice was gentle, but his hands were anything but. His hand trembled as he viciously scrubbed at the kiss marks on my neck. Humiliation washed over me. I shoved him with all my strength, grabbed the metal showerhead beside me, and hurled it at him. "Get out!" Caelum made no attempt to dodge. Blood trickled down his temple as he stared at me, his eyes dark and heavy. Fear gripped me. I trembled and shrank back, but he seized me by the throat. Then he crushed his lips against mine in a furious kiss. "I should get out? Then who do you want? That boy toy of yours?" he asked darkly. "Annette Morgan! I swear, I want you dead!" A sharp pain tore through my lips. The metallic taste of blood filled my mouth, followed by a sudden wave of stomach pain and nausea. I gagged and shoved him away. I ignored his bloodshot eyes and doubled over the edge of the tub, retching. "You find me disgusting?" His voice was hoarse and unsteady, thick with disbelief. But I had no strength left to answer. It felt as though someone were twisting a knife in my stomach, and the pain sent tremors through my entire body. "Annette, you've ruined everything! I already cut things off with her! What more do you want?" he roared. "Fine! From now on, we'll go our separate ways. Don't say I didn't warn you!" The door slammed shut with a deafening crash. Dead silence settled over the room. After a long while, I summoned what little strength I had left and climbed out of the bathtub. That was when I noticed a gift box on the sofa. I opened it and found a watch inside. It was the very one I'd casually circled just two days ago, one of only three in the world. In a daze, I recalled that Caelum had been carrying this very bag when he arrived earlier. After we remarried, Caelum seemed to revert to his old self. He turned down every social obligation and devoted all his time to me. He paid attention to even the smallest things I liked. If I so much as glanced at a bag twice, it would arrive at our house that very night. Time, money, love. He gave me everything. But I was no longer the same. Whenever he scrolled through his phone, I suspected he was messaging Nancy Valentin again. Whenever he opened Instagram, I was convinced he was looking at her photos. Nancy never once appeared before me, yet her presence haunted me constantly. Between my illness and everything that had happened with the two of them, I was on the verge of losing my mind. I couldn't take it anymore. Hence, I had an affair. I desperately wanted to know if someone that wonderful truly existed. Someone so irresistible that Caelum would willingly throw away 21 years of our relationship just to be with them. I picked up the card tucked inside the gift box. [Annie, happy seventh anniversary.] The words cut through my chest like a blade, and a bitter wind seemed to howl through the open wound. Just then, a friend request appeared on my phone. I recognized Nancy's profile picture instantly. Nancy: [Thank you for sending him back to me.] Chapter 2 I opened Nancy's profile. Her latest post showed her and Caelum locked in a passionate kiss beneath a sky full of fireworks. In the photo, the fireworks formed the shape of a rabbit. I recognized the display instantly. Caelum had originally arranged it for me. Now, it had become part of their romantic reunion instead. Things like this had happened so often over the past few years that I felt far calmer than I had expected. I was even composed enough to tap Like on the post. Caelum called me immediately, his voice thick with irritation. "What's that supposed to mean?" "Nothing. Congratulations on getting back together." "You're the one who drove me back to her. Don't come crying to me later." Caelum's voice had returned to its familiar indifference. He must have assumed I was jealous again, just as I used to be. He hung up without another word. I swallowed a handful of pills, my expression blank. … Within a single week, Caelum had made me the biggest laughingstock in our social circle. He took Nancy to one lavish gala after another and entrusted her with a string of top-tier projects. She had already been a star, but now her name was impossible to ignore. He even held a ceremony to exchange vows with her and sent the invitation straight to me. Yet I accepted it without a fuss. I didn't fly into a rage as I would have in the past. Meanwhile, Caelum's expression grew darker with each passing day. Nancy: [So what if you managed to remarry him, you crazy woman? His heart still belongs to me.] I glanced at Nancy's message before tearing the invitation to pieces. Then I walked into my studio and pulled the cloth from a canvas, revealing a woman's face. It was my mother. A dull ache spread through my stomach, and a thin trickle of blood escaped the corner of my mouth. My hand trembled as I picked up my brush. With what little time I had left, I wanted to finish one last painting. Then I would go find my mother. … It was the night of Caelum's birthday party. Nancy clung to his arm as she greeted the guests, acting as though she were the real Mrs. Pemberton. I could feel the guests' mocking gazes on me. Nancy approached me with a triumphant smile and raised her hand to show off the diamond ring on her finger. For a moment, its brilliance was almost painful to look at. I knew that design better than anyone. I had created it myself for my wedding ring when I first married Caelum. Now, that same design adorned his mistress' finger. The only difference was that her diamond was worth far more than mine had ever been. The contrast between us was just as stark. She looked radiant and beautiful, while I had grown pale and gaunt. She let out a soft laugh, her voice dripping with contempt. "Annie, how did you let yourself become so pathetic? "When you two divorced, I told Cael not to be so cruel. I even asked him to give you some money. But I never expected... "Even after remarrying him, you're still living like a pauper. Look at you, all shabby and miserable. Tell me, have you gone back to work at the nightclub?" Caelum stood by without a word and allowed her to humiliate me. He was waiting for me to beg him. Instead, I stepped forward, seized a fistful of Nancy's hair, and slapped her so hard that she sprawled across the floor. Caelum's expression changed instantly. "Annette!" He roared my name and grabbed me, intent on dragging me into a room off the banquet hall. I fought him with every ounce of strength I had, but my entire body suddenly went rigid. The electrical wiring caught fire, and the lights went out. Chapter 3 The crowd surged and shouted. Caelum's grip loosened for a moment, and the crowd swept us apart. My face drained of color. I curled up in a corner, cold sweat soaking my back. I pressed a hand to my chest and struggled to catch my breath. I was terrified of the dark. A spiteful laugh sounded above me, followed by a sharp blow to my head. It was Nancy. She struck me repeatedly with an ashtray. She seized my hair and yanked me up. "How dare you hit me?" She shoved handful after handful of ash into my mouth. I gagged. The pain in my head was relentless, and blood streamed into my eyes, stinging them and bringing fresh tears. The darkness pushed my terror beyond its limits. My voice cracked as I instinctively called out Caelum's name. "Caelum—" Another slap struck my face. "You're a pathetic coward who's afraid of the dark. Why didn't you just die with your mother back then?" I froze. My heart sank into an abyss, and a sharp, needling pain spread through my chest. For a moment, I was back in that dark room. I was 17 when my father had an affair with a woman of considerable social standing. She had my mother and me kidnapped and locked in a windowless room for five days and five nights. I watched my gentle, beautiful mother rot before my eyes until nothing remained but bare white bones. In the end, Caelum was the one who rescued me. My father, that animal, had simply said, "If she's dead, she's dead. If you don't want to be part of this family anymore, you can get out too." Those were the most painful days of my life. And Caelum had told Nancy everything. Blood kept pouring from my mouth in waves. My tears flowed uncontrollably, as though they would never run dry. Then I heard Caelum's panicked voice. "Annie! Where are you? Annette!" I struggled to answer, but Nancy's voice drowned out my feeble attempt. "Ah! Cael, I fell! My foot hurts so much!" Caelum rushed over, scooped Nancy into his arms, and hurried out with her. He walked right past me without stopping. My phone screen lit up. Caelum: [Annie, beg me, and I'll come find you.] I stared at the message in the darkness, my eyes fixed on those words. Then I began to laugh. I forced back my tears. Those words were painfully familiar. He had said the exact same thing when we divorced. Chapter 4 The day I discovered Caelum was cheating on me was our fifth wedding anniversary. I had planned a surprise for him at a hotel, but on my way out, I spotted him with his arm around a striking woman with black hair and red lips. They kissed as they walked, oblivious to everything around them. I sat alone at home from afternoon until evening. At 8:00 p.m., Caelum returned with an emerald necklace identical to the one I'd seen around that woman's neck. "Annie, happy fifth anniversary." He smiled and leaned in to kiss me, but I pulled away. "Where were you?" I asked. "Just a business dinner. If it bothers you, I'll skip the next one." Whatever had been holding me together finally snapped. I barely recognized myself as I screamed until my voice gave out and smashed everything within reach. "How could you do this to me? You lied to me!" The memory of my mother's death came rushing back. I couldn't accept it. My own husband had turned out just like that animal I called my father. He had cheated on me, too. Caelum dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around me, crying as he begged for forgiveness. "I'm sorry, Annie. I'm so sorry. What happened with her was a mistake. I've already ended things with her. Please, can't you just let this go?" And like a fool, I believed him. Afterward, Caelum blacklisted Nancy from every project, and I did everything I could to forget his betrayal and restore what we'd once had. Then Nancy sent me photos from her bed. [Your husband is such a bad boy. He claims he blacklisted me, but he really just wanted to keep me as his mistress.] When I confronted Caelum, he rubbed his temples in irritation. "Annie, Nancy isn't like you. She wasn't born into money. She built everything she has from nothing, and I feel for her. "I've already told you that the body and the mind are separate. You're still the one I love. Can you please stop making a scene?" For a moment, I felt as though I were meeting Caelum for the first time. A terrible chill settled deep inside me. I contacted a paparazzo, hoping to expose Nancy and destroy her reputation, but Caelum thwarted every attempt. He had built Nancy's career with his own two hands. He even forced me into a divorce that left me with nothing. "Annie, you'll walk away with nothing if we divorce, so what's the point of fighting over any of this? If you're willing to accept things as they are, you can still be Mrs. Pemberton." For the next 179 days, I felt myself die a little more with each passing day. Night after night, sleep eluded me. My hands trembled without warning. I vomited uncontrollably and broke down sobbing until I had no tears left. I couldn't even hold a paintbrush anymore. I'd lost the one skill I relied on to make a living. Half out of my mind, I bit my own wrist until the skin was raw and bloody. I obsessively scrolled through Nancy's more than 2,000 Instagram posts, scrutinizing every photo for some trace of Caelum, desperate to piece together exactly when their affair had begun. Online, I cursed them both and wished them dead. I hadn't been the one who shattered the glass, yet I was the one forced to walk across the shards, again and again. Then, one day, I ran into Caelum at the hospital, my cancer diagnosis clutched in my hand. He had accompanied Nancy to her checkup. I was gaunt and hollow-eyed, barely recognizable, while the two of them looked radiant together, as though they were made for each other. Caelum frowned, his expression otherwise unreadable. "Annie, you don't look well." Tears immediately streamed down my face. In the end, fear overwhelmed everything else. I was terrified of suffering the same fate as my mother, of dying alone in some rented room without anyone even knowing I was gone. I desperately needed something, anything, to reassure me that I was still alive, even if it meant clinging to a love that had rotted away from within. And so I said the words. "Caelum, I was wrong." A satisfied smile spread across his face, and just like that, we remarried. Chapter 5 Caelum refused to believe Nancy had hurt me and dismissed the whole incident. "The production team invited me to appear on a variety show as Nancy's boyfriend. What do you think?" Caelum asked as he sat beside me, his tone deliberately casual. Another sharp pain tore through my stomach. I had no desire to speak to him. "Sounds great. No complaints from me." His hand froze halfway through turning a page. My continued indifference finally pushed his long-simmering frustration to the breaking point. He pinned me against the sofa, his eyes bloodshot with rage, and shouted as if he were on the verge of losing control, "Annette! Do you really not care at all? What the hell do you want from me? How long are you going to keep this up? Do you want me to beg for your forgiveness? Do you want me on my knees?" I lowered my eyes and swallowed back the blood that rose in my throat. "Isn't this exactly what you wanted from me?" Caelum ignored my attempts to struggle free. He tore open my clothes and pressed one kiss after another along my neck. "Are you going to force yourself on me?" I asked flatly. He went rigid. After a long silence, he forced the words through gritted teeth. "Annette, for every ounce of pain you put me through, I'll make you suffer ten times as much! If that's how you want it, we'll just keep tearing each other apart until we're both dead!" He released me and stormed out. The moment he was gone, I could no longer hold back the blood that surged up my throat. I broke into a violent cough and spat out a mouthful of blood. Caelum stopped in the doorway. He stood motionless for a long time but never once looked back. … I hadn't expected his retaliation to come so quickly. The painting in my studio vanished, and shortly afterward, Nancy posted an update on her social media feed. Nancy: [All I had to do was ask, and he handed it right over.] My chest heaved as blood rose in my throat. I squeezed my eyes shut several times, desperate to steady myself. … When I rushed to Nancy's place, I found the two of them in bed together, barely dressed. But what truly shattered me was what lay beneath them. It was the portrait I had painted of my mother. Caelum shoved Nancy aside without a second thought, sat up, and lit a cigarette. "What now? Have you finally come to your senses and decided to admit you were wrong?" I stared at the filthy, ruined painting. My nails dug deep into my palms, and I clenched my jaw so tightly that my teeth ground together. "Cael said your hand is useless now anyway. Since you can't sell your paintings anymore, he figured he might as well give this one to me." Nancy flashed me a taunting smile. "I sent the rug out for cleaning, so I thought I'd use this to cover the mattress instead. You don't mind, do you?" A wave of fury consumed me, overwhelming every last shred of reason. I snatched up a nearby vase and smashed it against Nancy's head without hesitation. "Die!" Nancy screamed. Caelum lunged forward and seized my arm. "Are you out of your fucking mind?" "Caelum, you deserve to die too! Why don't you both just drop dead?" I screamed through my tears and sank my teeth into his arm with all my strength. He froze. Then he came to his senses, seized my face in a bruising grip, and roared at me, "You're cursing me to die over a fucking painting?" Beneath his fury, I could hear something that sounded almost like hurt. His words abruptly caught in his throat. His voice seemed to drift farther and farther away. A red haze clouded my vision. I had coughed up blood again, and this time, it splattered across his face. The room spun around me, and I collapsed into Caelum's arms. His voice reached me in broken fragments, as faint and distant as if I were drowning. "Annette! Annie… what's wrong… with you?" His face was a picture of panic and confusion. All at once, I felt unbearably tired. "Caelum, we don't have to keep tearing each other apart anymore. I'm dying." His expression went completely blank. Before he could even comprehend my words, hot tears had already begun to fall onto my face.